where's my muse?

Yet another day has passed and still...nothing. Now more than ever, I am convinced that my muse has definitely gone AWOL! Any idea where she might have gone? I've been searching for her for weeks now, months even. But to no end. none, nada, zilch, wala

*imagine Carrie's V.O. here*which brings me to the question...how does one find one's muse?

To cure the dreaded oh-no-I-can't-write-a-darn-thing syndrome, somebody once suggested I try blogging. To cut a long story short, I did as he suggested (obviously `cause here I am blogging :p). Is it working? you ask. I'm not sure yet. What I'm certain of is that as I write this blog, I'm keeping myself from writing what I really need-have to-must write. My manuscript. (whose deadline by the way was last month!)

*imagine me here panicking*

I guess I'm just delaying the inevitable. And what for me is inevitable? Being criticized. Being judged and subsequently be found lacking. This is among my many issues. My books are my babies. My babies are me. I consider them and me as one and the same. So if anyone says anything against them, I can't help but feel that it's a personal affront against me.

This is wrong, I know. What I should be thinking is that I can't please everybody, NO MATTER WHAT. And that I am not my work. It's just a part of who I am. But how do you do away with something that's woven so deep in your psyche?